A journalversary!

When I was in high school, I kept a pretty regular diary ("I love [insert name of current boyfriend here] so much, he is just so nice and cute! I am so lucky!" *modern day rolling of eyes*). But somewhere around my Junior year, I fell out of the habit, and never really picked it back up. I've received some cool journal notebooks as gifts over the years, but tucked them into the top drawer of my dresser, saying "Someday I'll use them."

On January 20, 2008, I picked up one of those journals and wrote in it. And I did it again the next day. And again the next, and the next, and the next.

One year ago today, it was just two months after the accident, and I was still pretty traumatized, having physical pain, emotional issues, and nightmares. In those two months, I spent way too much time focusing on the crap that resulted from the accident, particularly as it related to me. My fears, my pain, the disruption of my life. It was doing me absolutely no good whatsoever, but acknowledging that fact made no difference. I had to DO something. In writing that first journal entry, my intent was to write down the things I'm grateful for (to help me focus on the good things in my life), as well as my prayers for others (to help me take my focus off of me). I tossed in a quick summary of the day's events, and thus began my journaling habit.

I've only missed one day that I can remember, and am now half-way through my third notebook. And I still use the same format: Quick summary, stuff I'm thankful for today, and my prayers for the day. Many days the Praises and the Prayers are the same as the day before, but writing them each day helps me remember them each day. Many days I've had to struggle mightily to stay awake to finish the entry, but every day I did it.

And now I'm wondering why it took me 20 years to return to journaling! Even in the past year, it has been helpful not only to my mental health, but also to my memory. When did we go to see the Butterfly Exhibit? Oh, yeah, it was Thursday, March 27th. What day did we find out Erin is pregnant? Yep, here it is. Friday, September 26th.

Which makes me think of all the memories I could have quickly recorded on the day they happened that are now lost or muddled in the haze of time. I have no idea when Sunshine lost her first tooth. I couldn't tell you when Bookman first learned to ride a bike without training wheels. No idea what those kids' names are in the pictures of 3rd birthday parties. *sigh* These are things I wish I'd written down. And if I'd been in the habit of journaling daily... *bigger sigh*

No more memories lost like that. I shall continue to take 20-30 minutes to sit quietly, reflect, and write a daily letter to God.