Danged doorknobs

Auditions: A first-person narrative by me

So I spend a good 10 minutes in the lobby, adjusting my confidence--it's on frontwards, right? Good. The suspenders aren't too flashy? What? I need 'em to hold my confidence up, duh. It tends to sag in situations like this.

Oh geez, it's my turn already! Wish me luck!

I walk to the audition room with grace and poise. I take a deep calming breath and step inside. "Hello! My name is---herk!" Aack! My suspenders got caught on the doorknob! The consummate professional (*snerk*), I continue on as though nothing is amiss. "My name is Stacey. I'm audtioning for the part of [role] and I'll be singing [song]." As I reach out to hand the director's helper my music, I feel the clips on my suspenders pop away from my confidence. There is a moment of panic, but maybe maybe maybe my confidence will stay up just this once oh please oh please oh please.

The music starts, and I belt out the first line of the song. Yay! I inhale to begin the next line when suddenly my confidence sinks to my knees and I'm exposed. My voice wavers and I try to inconspicuously grab hold of some confidence before it drops completely and puddles on the floor. Ohmygosh! I hope to goodness the director doesn't notice. There! I get a handful of confidence and hold on for dear life! "Lalalalaaaaaa...."

Whew! Song is over! I managed to get through it and even pulled my confidence up a bit. Okay, I can do this. The director hands me an unfamiliar page from the script to read. Without thinking I take it with both hands. Mistake! Mistake! Unsupported, my confidence starts to sag again, lower and lower as I read, until it's around my shins.

"Thank you," the director says. "We'll let you know if we need to see you at callbacks."

And I shuffle out of the room, trying not to trip over the confidence that is now drooped around my ankles, dragging on the floor.

*sigh*

#$%#@ suspenders and @$&% doorknobs.